Lovely days

When I was a kid we had a lovely christmas with our mum and dad, brother and sisters, grandmothers and neighbours. We had lovely pressies, lovely lunch, lovely dinner, and at the end of the day we vanished into our bedrooms to get a good night's sleep which would lead us into just another day. Christmas day was for children.

As we got older our christmas days were joined with our new partners, friends and new neighbours, and as we got older again some of us had 'lost' our partners and the christmas days were the same lovely days but with different people. Christmas day was for 'older' children.

I had thought of this day until my kids were grown up. My dad died in the middle of the year, 2001. Christmas day was certainly for children. When I met my second husband neither of us were really into christmas days, and we drove our own cars or rode our own motorbikes around Waikato in NZ, later Queensland in Australia, to enjoy our own christmas days, have a takeaway lunch, head home again. It was so peaceful, not dragged into christmas celebration. Mum died in the middle of the year, 2007, but christmas day was certainly for children.

My son, his wife and two kids moved to Aus, and for our first christmas with my grandchildren we actually had a lovely family event, at my home, with me cooking our lovely lunch and lovely dinner. Christmas was for children and family. That only lasted one year when my son's wife decided she didn't like me and christmas was at their own home, with only my daughter and in-law. Not me, but I didn't miss christmas - just my grandchildren.

My second husband eventually missed his NZ family and headed back to NZ for christmas, without me. He'd come back to Aus, but after two years of him doing that he decided that his family meant lots to him, and left me. Lovely present.

How many people can think this way about christmas? I watched some news and ads on TV and retailers were trying to convince everyone that christmas was okay, good. Lovely. Shops were left open a whole night before christmas day, supermarkets were so full. Everyone spending money. Very few people were alone, understanding that they would be alone on christmas day.

Me? I will have a lovely lunch with my daughter and in-law, I bought them some lovely pressies and will get something lovely back, I even bought something for my dogs! Then I will come home, retreat into my office/spare bedroom and play cards on my computer.

This particular day doesn't mean anything to me. I wish all my readers a lovely day. Just not christmas.

"Dis" - ability

Stella Young didn't know me. I sort-of knew her, at least her "public" role - comedian, on ABC TV, speaking at TEDx Sydney. Wikipedia seemed to do an article about her from 2011. She seemed to "appeared" in public back years, until this year. She died on 6 December 2015. No-one really knows how; ABC mentioned her, but not how. In SMH there is a very small mention of what killed her: "Young's family told the ABC she died peacefully on Saturday. It is understood Young died of a suspected aneurysm."

Where is there anything written about Stella's "suspected aneurysm"? Did she know of it? Did her family? Her GP? Anyone? Where was this "suspected aneurysm"? In her stomach? In her brain? In her heart?

Why is there so little known about aneurysms?

Last year when I - for the first time - received a CT identifying my own aneurysm, I did some investigation. I wrote "Aneurysm Aphorism" blogspot (which was full of info but has sort of gone to sleep now, sorry) and found some Australian information, and much more information from USA. So many websites, with info that seemed very good.  Yet how many people know anything about aneurysms - which can kill you? How many people know anything about aneurysms rather than or as well as breast cancer? Prostate cancer? Heart disease? Bone problems? Are there any fundraising places which are helpful to the understanding about aneurysms? Just what are aneurysms and when do they happen?

When can we find out anything about Stella Young's "suspected aneurysm"?

I thought I'd just repeat some info about aneurysms, so you, Reader (hopefully Sharer), will know something about them. Why? Because it is so important, with a growing problem, to actually know a little bit about them. 

• Google will separate out aneurysms into "brain", "aortic" or "abdominal". You need to know where the aneurysm is. Don't always assume it is in the brain.
• Brain aneurysms occur in approximate 2% of adults. (www.brainfoundation.org.au)
• 20% of these 2% people will have two or more aneurysms. (http://www.neurosurgicalassociates.com.au/cerebral.html)
• When an aneurysm ruptures it can cause a severe headache. (www.avmsurgeon.com/aneurysms.html)
• In Australia 1600 people are recorded as rupturing; 39% of those (624) will die. (www.avmsurgeon.com/aneurysms.html)
• Aneurysms may not have any symptoms until they rupture. (www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au/bhcv2/bhcarticles.nsf/pages/Aneurysm)
• "Saccular" (or berry) aneurysm is the most common type of aneurysm (80-90%). "Fusiform" is different, but seldom ruptures. (www.bafound.org/brain-aneurysm-basics)
• As soon as finding out about your aneurysm, talk to your doctor and get a reception to a neurosurgeon.

Did you know any of this?  Do you act similarly to this info as to any that you get on, say, breast cancer? Do you support it? Would you put any money into a funding raiser? Would that be to support surgery or info blogging? Or a representative who will make public speeches? Did you actually read any information that I gave you?

Do you know someone with an aneurysm?

Stella Young was so "ability" (she hated the word "disability"). Yet it's probably unseen as to what caused her death. Aneurysm? She supported many funded causes, but what caused her an aneurysm? Did she actually have one? If so, where do we find that out? If not, who put that into the editor writing??

Stella Young was a wonderful person, so active, so canny, so well trained. I should have been that - I have my own ability, and I know that she hates the "other" word. Just now, just from a very brief mention, we can certainly understand why or how she managed to die. Regardless of why or how, she had a wonderful life. Just for now, just this moment, I might even just let some people turn their vibes away from most people, which, it seems, like someone just did that in a report about Stella.

You are forgiven, just now. But don't ever do that again. I found a report on the ABC that some hospital was criticised with communication failures about aneurysms, back in 2009. We know, now, that aneurysm time is possibly against everyone.

Teach everyone who needs to know about aneurysm. They can help to keep someone alive.

No longer loving "life"

At my age I have given up my love of my life. Why? Because I'm sick of having to always been "someone" who means "something" to others, when very few people choose me because I no longer mean "something" to anyone. A few years ago I got married (second time) and loved it - loved my life, loved my husband, loved moving to Australia, loved my work. Last year I got struck with the down-stuff just for my life. My husband (ex?) decided he preferred New Zealand, my brain aneurysm was found, my job was lost. This year I went to hospital for my surgery and ended up with a stroke. So here am I.

A few months after leaving hospital (locked in there for 6.5 weeks - did I tell anyone that??) I moved to Woody Point. I love the beach here, but I don't know anyone. Not socially. I was helped at CBRT for a few months - which I didn't realise, until the day I was told, that this was a short term engagement for me, thanks to the government. Taking something like that away from someone who is new here, or who has a new future (nothing repeating after your surgery and stroke) is so unfair.

Just like losing your husband/wife/partner.

Just like losing your employment.

Just losing most of your friends who don't live in this area.

I met and joined a stroke group, a STEPs group, a Heart Care group at a gym which I joined, I met so many people who seemed to be so good - but I don't know any of them. I have problems with my memory. Why is that, that no-one seems to understand it?

 I Googled for pictures for this blog. I found this, about crying - and not needing to. I do so much as this picture - I tried to hold my tears when I am out, but they can get out when I am home. My beautiful dogs know when I am crying and will come to me to support me. I live for them, because they don't do anything they don't need to ask me for. Sounds funny. But it's not.

I have told myself that I am just plainly not happy with the christmas general time, including shopping, carols, meals, friends, family dah de dah. That seems to have an ironic reek to how I felt about christmas the last 2-3 (or many more) years, because of how my own family treated me. I don't feel too loved. Sad, but true.

This time I am down. After TEDxSB last weekend I felt down. Actually, before that I felt down, because this is my 3rd year but I wasn't helping this year. Not my cuppa. I left and went home at the end of the day, felt I had done too much to take in, have felt even lower than before that. Is there any stuff to take me UP??

After christmas might be my positive place, where I'll be. I have another CT on my second aneurysm, I have a QIRC court case in February (no thanks to the lawyer who dropped me way back at the hospital), but I can't work, yet. Will I? Ever?

I'm 58. That's not just "middle age". It is past "middle age" for most people - in the world. If my life is

actually over, it sounds great. But if I live on I have to live with myself, no one who will help me, no one who might look after me if I get worse. I am not Australian, even though I have lived here for 9.5 years. This whole management of population funds is what's bringing the whole world down, and doing a damned good job in Aus.I found this picture on Google also today. It means much to me. Friendless. Destitute. Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense. I'm addicted. I just feel that I had a wonderful childhood, which I lost when I "grew up". Long before rapists grew up. I am still recovering from it, after 40 years.

So I am waiting for "after christmas", for my positive place.

Enjoy your own christmas.

Reading is good for the soul

My lovely mornings, every other morning, resulted in my music yoga CD, “Mind, Body and Soul”. This gentle introduction CD was working on me, to keep me meditated. Today I read beside it. I have only finished two books since my operation in April this year, and I still have 3 other books which I had started, lying around just waiting for me. I was using my books as recovery from my brain injury, yet they were still so much harder than I had ever found books.

I always loved books, I always had a shelf (or two) of just my favourites, I brought some of my favourites from NZ when I moved over here nine and a half years ago, I have given books away, sold them, bought them, wandered through book stores, been to State Library or Brisbane Library, attended readings at Avid Bookstore and have kept reading my entire life, until my operation. I am coming around to it now – it is recovery.

The latest book I finished is called “Wings of Madness: a mother’s journey”, by Jo Buchanan. Jo is the mother of Miles Buchanan, who had been well known on Australian TV during his youth, before he had suffered from his own brain problems – depression, to just identify it as “something”.  Miles wrote a “Last Word”, which turned me to thinking. This gentleman seems to have become religious during his recovery. He wrote: “We mustn’t let logic and modern scientific theories that support atheism get us down.” And other writing.

 I have been atheist for many years. I don’t believe that it has caused me any problems. I do believe, firmly, that religious is what causes every person and everything all sorts of problems. Just about every politician in Australia – in the world – appears to have some sort of religious belief which runs them and their life and their decisions. The very best politician is José Mujica, the President of Uruguay. According to the history about this presently-serving person, he donates 90% of his monthly income to people of lower income under him. Mujica refused to live in the Uruguay presidential palace and use palace staff. That sort of choice is so different than most of the world, and yet it is so real.

Most Australian politicians should make themselves aware of the history of women, and should not be so silly – such as Julie Bishop. This LNP woman accused ALP Tanya Plibersek of undermining the ALP leader, Bill Shorten. Why does that count? Shorten doesn’t come across as a good leader. Plibersek does. Bishop should be joining with the Australian voters against Abbott, another bad leader, rather than against Plibersek. Abbott recently attended the climate meeting in China, yet he said that jobs and growth income are “so” much important than a 16 year climate change. If he riddled this, Australia is just heading backwards.

 

Under Abbott, Australia has picked up its religion - Christianity. Christian schools make so much more money than state schools, and in this country other religions aren’t so important. Under recent war in East countries, against ISIL (Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant), Aussie soldiers have been sent over there to fight against them. ISIL is just as stupid as Australian home politicians, and yet no-one take this in. There are some women in Syria who are fighting against the ISIL – they need to win, not so-called good (male) soldiers from everywhere in the world.

 But hang on – did you know that the ISIL is often known as ISIS (Islamic State of Iraq and Syria)? How many (Western) journalists who continue to use ISIS as they are writing are at all aware of Isis, a (female) ruler in Egypt BCE? Wiki wrote some very interesting history about her. She was “a goddess from the polytheistic pantheon of Egypt. She was first worshiped in Ancient Egyptian religion, and later her worship spread throughout the Roman empire and the greater Greco-Roman world.” How many people fighting the ISIL as their proclaimed ISIS are aware of the original Isis? Don’t disagree with Wiki – read the books they list at the bottom of their Isis history! However, it is unfortunate that, due to systematic and rational statements on religion, past Egyptologists believed that there was an increasing move toward monotheism. This is another Wiki page, but possibly most Christian school attendees don’t read it – or will never understand it. Why? Well, because they just have “teachers”!

Back to my original paragraph. I wrote about my books, and I haven’t changed – I still love them! I am certain that whilst I have my TBI I will be a lot slower at reading, but I know that I am getting over it. After all, all the other paragraphs were just ultra-thoughts. I have more of my own books to read. See you again!

Always Look on the Bright Side of Life

Most people I know are aware of this fun old (1979) song, written by Eric Idle for Monty Python. How many do know the actual words? What about extra words?

When you’re stuck on the World stage,
With lots of loonies half your age,
And everything is starting to go wrong.
It’s too late to run away,
You might as well just stay,
Especially when they play your silly song

These were just added in the 2012 closing ceremony at Summer Olympics. It's funny - I think it is! It reminds me of my stroke. Often, I don't think of my stroke as being my past. In fact, my future is now open - because I have a long way to go to get back to my history. The more I find out about it, the more people I meet, the more people I talk to, this is just okay. Just fine. Just.... well, dandy!

This month started with a blog which seemed just a little disappointed with my history - or my future, but my last week sped me up into my future. My calendar looked pretty full.

On Monday I registered for the 2015 Fun Run for cancer, telling my daughter and daughter-in-law that I was walking/running for their mum / mum-in-law who had died from cancer earlier this year. Later that morning I went to the Dolphins gym and pool, and have a free 3-day meeting next week so I will probably join. I told Lilly at CBRT afterwards.This pool is a 25m, which I can remember almost as much as my old pool at Algester. I think I can grow into these things! I belonged to Les Mills gym in NZ and was very Combat-fit. I just loved it. The Dolphins doesn't do Combat, but has some stuff that I could quite possibly join in and enjoy.

I met Dane at CBRT on Tuesday so he could check me out for the reference to CRS, finding me a couple of days work in some sort of job that I might feel capable for. I hope this will work! Later that morning I went into the Redcliffe Courthouse to see the JP for a signature on my book contract, and was told that the (huge) crowd here today was waiting for child matters which I suppose the Court might be hearing. I left there pretty fast.

Wednesday was an arrangement with Anne to go to Eumundi market, since neither of us had done that for a long time. I remember going to it a couple of years ago and buying some lovely pants, but hadn't been near it for years before that, when they were still an "old" market. This place seems to be huge, and so many stalls have clothes... too many wonderful places to look through! It was just great that the sky was clouded, at least the morning, because it was just a little cooler than a full market and a sunshine sky makes it. We stopped for a bit of food and, after nearly 3 hours, decided we needed to leave.

The Harrids cafe in North Lake was the venue for a Stroke Club coffee on Thursday. This was my very first event with this club, and I loved it! There were so many people, who I had never previous met, who had also had a stroke, and some were a lot faded than me. This was one place where I could miss my language without feeling I had lost something; I could forget my words and think longer about them without anyone adding a word in; having a coffee and scone which just about everyone else was enjoying! By the time I got back to Redcliffe CBRT I was happy to see Lilly, and I told her how "losing" her was not, by now, really worrying me. I am sure it was the Stroke Club which caused that - I feel great! Bridie also tested me at the end of my speech pathology, and was happy enough with me. That was probably just an "oh dear" with Bridie, who had been out of the office for quite a while that I had been there.

By Friday morning I got into Redcliffe Art Gallery for my first morning of volunteering. It was very quiet, but that didn't worry me. Getting in there and feeling my surround and meeting people was just what should happen. My volunteer co-worker was Inge, who has been at the gallery for a while and knows it and will be teaching me every Friday.

Morayfield on Saturday morning was for my next appointment with Dr Jane. Last week I had a very hard time finding their office because my map print out was incorrect. I had been 10 minutes late, and I think that sort of wound me up. On this Saturday I had felt very calm, and I remember talking with Dr Jane about my childhood. I have so many great memories about that, which I now seem to have open and earthly in my memory. Is that truly owned by my stroke?

And finally after Morayfield I returned back into the Redcliffe Art Gallery to hear one of the artists, William Yang, talk about his photography. He is a wonderful fellow who has done his photography for such a long time (which the gallery manager introduced). Our displace only has three framed photos and one TV with a live film, but William Yang can be read about through Felix Media.

So this was my remarkable week which was full every day with things I had to do to feel pretty good about my future. I received an email this week from the QIRC about my Notice of Listing with the Workers' Compensation Regulator. I have no thoughts that I might just lose this - or just win this. I know the history of this case, and I have to present to people who don't know me. I have to ensure I don't lose my future if I don't win. In the week which has gone onwards, with futures in it for me, I don't have any problems about this matter. I just need to remember - I already have my future, whether or not it involves my history.

Pretty good, eh?

So it seems...

Last Friday I had a first meeting with a psychological person a wee way away from my home. I had prepared - as I now know I need to - by finding where they were, printing out a map, and driving up just a wee bit early. I couldn't find them. The map was wrong. I searched on my phone and eventually did find them, 10 minutes late. Maybe, I convinced myself, that I had gotten myself lost; I truly believed that a psychological person wouldn't believe me.

Dr J is very good. She seemed to pick up a lot of my problems with my verbal issues with my language. I also forgot lots, tried to remember things, told her when I did. Didn't sound too good. She listened, she took notes, I cried, I stopped, I tried to talk. Finally she asked me if I had ever had a neuropsychological assessment. No, I hadn't. I remembered my visit to the brain aneurysm team at some stage after the surgery, but I couldn't say when it was. I think it was sometime before I got released, and resulted in a report send back to BIRU for my release. Dr J asked if I could remember the names of the people who were presently treating me, and she would contact one for some info about neuropsychological assessment.

Later that afternoon, on the train into town, I got a phone call from my social worker, Lilly. Seems she had received a call from Dr J, who talked with her about neuropsychological assessment for me. That was only a part of her discussion with me. It seems that next week is my last week with CBRT. The first time they had told me. I felt my tears coming back, but I had to try to hold them in because the train is not, for me, private.

Lilly, I know, is a wonderful person to work with me. Next week I will meet up with her a couple of days before the final event, and talk with her about neuropsychological assessment. Today I had read a Brainline article by Kara Swanson on October 27, 2011. Three years before our approaching Halloween. Kara came across as so much like I now feel.

Traumatic brain injury is the most clever of masks. It parades us out there as normal people. Many of us look no different than we did before we were hurt. We keep hearing, “You look great!” But it hides a darker reality.

Oh yes, this is so much me. This "mask", which I seem to wear most days and which was a result of my brain aneurysm and stroke, led to quite a bit of pathology at both PA and CBRT, and has now ended up, a week before my last CBRT, with a visit to a psychological person.

On the train, talking to Lilly, was a bad episode. She asked me how I would feel next week. I told her how I had coped with the wonderful people who had worked with me, and how I would go downhill when they left. This is the "usual" treatment to health patients. They don't choose this, it's part of the overall health system. Perhaps some people are easy. Others, like me, are not.

Today I looked in the UQ website and found some literature about neuropsychological assessment. It said:

Neuropsychological assessments are requested to help understand how the different areas and systems of the brain are working. Testing is usually recommended when there are symptoms or problems with memory or thinking. This may be because a person has a change in their concentration, organisation, reasoning, memory, language, perception, coordination or personality. These changes may be due to a number of causes (medical, genetic, psychological).

Certainly sounds good, but they charge. Someone, like me, is on a DSP. I can't afford to pay for those at UQ. I also found Advanced Neuropsychological Treatment Service (ANTS), which said:

A neuropsychological assessment conducted by a specialist clinical neuropsychologist can inform a new or corrected diagnosis, which can in turn shape the development of an appropriate treatment program. Significant resources can be saved with a correct diagnosis and appropriate treatment program. 

"Appropriate treatment program"? Perhaps I am way off the road, but any "appropriate treatment program" seems to be costly unless someone has money.

When I woke up in PA after my surgery, and at some time in the future I found out I'd had a stroke, I was never told why a stroke could happen exactly at my surgery. It's funny, isn't it? Happened at my surgery? Is this the revealing of what actually happened? Was it really a stroke or was it caused by the surgery? Does PA know? Do my PA and CBRT pathology teams know? How am I supposed to know about it?

So this is leading back to my phone talk with Lilly. Ever since Centrelink gave me DSP I don't - can't - feel hopeful. I don't have any real idea about how long they will keep me on DSP, how old I will get, if I can ever find a job. If I am required to. Lilly gave it all to me. I will, because I have real problems, it seems stay on DSP until I am 65, then transferred to superannuation.

So, it seems, I am now exactly retired. I hope everyone else enjoys their retirement. I think I am having to plan ahead.

So much to do!

After the last couple of weeks I have had to unwind my thoughts on what I have been doing.... it seems like a lot of stuff!

Last week I went to the Redcliffe pool to check it out. This place is 50m, a wee bit different than I was used to for quite a while. I seem to remember that the 50m pool I had swum in was in Hamilton, NZ, and the one I used over here is just 25m. But that was not a problem... recovery from my PA Hospital surgery was my ongoing problem. I did 10 lengths - 500m, a whole lot of short from what I had swum before I went in for my brain aneurysm!

Still, 7 months of no swimming picked up a little bit at Dolphins Health League. Their pool is 25m, which I am used to. I worked with Kara from CBRT the next day, doing just 500m but a whole extra training she worked me through. For the next couple of days my left arm was a wee bit sore! Last weekend, on Saturday, I had visited my doctor to get a medical release for my swimming, which will help me to get some training. It made up for itself this week, when I ramped my swim to 750m and then did a whole hour of Aqua Splash, with Kara joining me. I felt so good! I would love to take a class in the water, preferable that the timing of the movements are joined to the water, not simply jumping about too fast on the dry side.

On Sunday I took the train into CBD and joined the Walk Together event, from Kurilpa Park across the bridge to the event area on Roma Street. I am non-religious, but this event did not appear religious, just fully open for mixed people living in Australia - which includes me! It was fun, and, from many reports throughout the whole of Australia, I can hope that it will just keep moving forward. The refugees in this country are still held back by the LNP, on Nauru, which is totally unacceptable. Read the abc report of 28 October, about some Nauru refugees teenagers beaten by Nauru residents.

This week I applied to Redcliffe Art Gallery for a role as a volunteer, and yesterday I went to meet some people and looked through this small gallery. I met a person who has been a vollie for 12 years - and she is from NZ... funny that! I have been accepted, and will be volunteering one morning of the week. I am so looking forward to this, it seems like just a place where I will fit in (even if it's not as big as the Drury Lane Theatre...). Today I caught up with Anne and we went up to Seaside Art Gallery in town, to (for me) compare it to Redcliffe Gallery. Seaside seems to be a sale gallery, which is okay - but some 
of the paintings are so unprofessional. It's a pity to see the paintings with price tags on, some of which seem far too expensive. This painting is the one that I definitely loved it. It was done by Tricia Reust, who has been busy at her style since 1999. Have a look through her website, there are so many different paintings!

I note from the Redcliffe newspaper than Vernon Ah Kee, at the Redcliffe Art Gallery, won the $8,000 prize for his angle driven art work, which I found amazed. Ah Kee was born in North Queensland and is of the Kuku Yalandji, Waanji, Yidindji and Gugu Yimithirr peoples, and his current style is a hitting hard artist. This particular drawing was a later drawing of an earlier one which also appears at Redcliffe Art Gallery. It thrills me.

Later this afternoon Anne and I drove out to Scarborough and had a wonderful (much!) lunch before we walked down along the beach. Anne raced to a tree and hugged it - she is so green! We walked further along the beach and out the little pedestrian piece into the water, and headed back when we saw a large tortoise lying on the rocks under the water ahead of the Scarborough beach, obviously dead. I felt so sorry about this poor animal, and tried to contact the Moreton Bay Council but wasn't able to find the phone number on my phone because it sometimes seems... broken. I rang them from home a little later, and they were hoping to get someone out there to pick it up. It might be dead, but it needs some sort of respect. I would suggest this tortoise, which had a whole heaps of barnacles on its belly, was pretty old. Rest, fella.

Back home this avo, and my dogs are okay. So good with them... maybe I need to take them out for a walk later.

... old life

“On average, four people are killed and ninety are seriously injured every day on Australia’s roads. The economic cost of road accidents in Australia is enormous—estimated at $27 billion each year—and the social impacts are devastating (Australian Transport Council 2011).”

This was the note contained within the Heart Foundation report “Move It: Australia’s Healthy Transport Options” provided earlier this year. The report was not really about the real circumstances to people injured or the reason why police, fire engines and ambulances attended the road incidents. There was no report about the injured children and the reason why they are in the car. There was no report about just why people have apparently unusual accidents.

Dr Lyn Roberts AM wrote: “Physical activity improves the chances of living longer with less disease. It protects against heart disease and stroke, as well high blood pressure and high blood cholesterol.” Perhaps that may be wonderful, but it doesn’t stand up to inspection of the usual seemingly okay person who drove their car off the road and caused the followers to call the help. Police, tow trucks, fire engine with crew, ambulances, more police. And us, little old people who might have some less physical activity with less protection against our very own heart disease and stroke.

Yet, this time, the woman who drove could have come under her own satellite, and driven off the edge of the road and into a tree. No alcohol. Could she have been internally ill?  Who would know anything?

Talking to this woman’s granddaughter, who had been inside the car and rescued whilst we waited for the fire engine which would cut her grandmother out, it seemed that her Nan had offered her love and attention while her daughter was overseas. No spendthrift. No failure. Nan looked after her two grandsons as well. Today was a break on the care of the grandsons, who, yet, wouldn’t have any idea. This accident seemed so very unfair.

Have you ever had an accident like this one? You have just driven off the road, no reason for doing that, nothing which has showed up to prove some medical problems? Would you do that out of fun? Bored? Tired? Do you know what caused it?

Neither do I. My own assumption is that this particular accident is a result from something inside the driver which turned her off. Unknown. Unfelt. Until she left the road and hit a tree and my friend and I had experienced some smoke from under the car motor, so getting her granddaughter out of the back seat was essential.

We were only at the site for a fairly short time this afternoon. After the police, fire and ambulance people turned up, we left. But the short hold of this accident has given us some thoughts. What goes on between this grandmother and granddaughter when they went off the road? What about ambulances which will take them to separate hospitals? Who has told the ambulance or police about the day care for the grandsons? What were we doing to stop any fires in the car? Who was helping us? What was all the traffic thinking of in this situation? Was anyone careful?

I had been 6.5 weeks in PA Hospital after my own stroke. Today I found that very obvious as the possibility for a cause of some medical problem with the driver in front of me when she left the road. And yet the police, the ambulance people, the fire engineers, the tow truck people, everyone who attended this accident have not, yet, had their own injury from some internal problem.

Perhaps we should be very grateful about that.

The Australian Transport Council in 2011 said: “The economic cost of road accidents in Australia is enormous—estimated at $27 billion each year—and the social impacts are devastating.” Today’s accident would have cost a whole heap as everyone who helped out – police, fire engineers, ambulance people, tow truckies – would still get paid, their gear gets used, the time is not diarised.

Are the social impacts devastating? Yes, they are. This accident, today, would not have been overly paid, and yet the driver had her own social personality. So did her granddaughter. So did her relations.

I hope that social impacts can be repaired, if the person is still alive. Perhaps the end of a life is a different story.

New Life

Have you ever lost your driver’s licence, for 6 months, from a medical statement? I did. I lost mine according to the doctor’s warning words about my aneurysm, but it was taking from me for 6 months due to my stroke. 6 months of not being able to drive – so very hard!

Last week I sat the assessment in the Redcliffe Health office – and I passed it. I am, right now, very grateful to my GP, who yesterday wrote me a little form which doctors are required to, gave me my own driver’s licence, and the form is dated for 2 years. I got home on the bus and I reintroduced myself to my car.

Yesterday afternoon I lay the car seats down, covered the back area with some old covers, and took my dogs out. Most days in the past they can walk by the bay which is close to my Woody Point address, but this time I took them out to the beach between Margate and Redcliffe.

It looks a bit funny with so many tiny jellyfish washed up onto the beach, but I am still aware that they could, possibly, be dangerous. I let the dogs walk along the beach just for a short while, before we took in the wooden walkway. It was lovely – I’m sure they thought so! Both of my old dogs are just happy to say hello to anyone who happens to walk past. Most people don’t ever ignore these two.

We went for a little drive down around Scarborough, and my dogs thought they were so lucky with the windows open!

This morning I decided to go out by myself, and the dogs were left in the house. Sorry guys, today was for me! I started down at the Redcliffe street market, where a couple of weekends ago I had found some cheap clothes and wore them today. I got there just after 8am and it had only started, so it didn’t really seem as full as it was on the past weekends. I had a fairly quick wander through the markets, and just wanted to drive my car.  It wasn’t hard.

I headed up north, taking the road out past Deception Bay, and got onto the M1 motorway. It wasn’t very full, so was probably a good time to get out there. I had printed out my internet maps, showing where I need to get off, so I could do a short – and very steep – walk up Wild Horse mountain. I found the park, and maybe I was still too early, but it was beautiful. There were two other cars in the carpark. One was empty, but there was a woman waiting at the other for her partner. I rather think I was just a wee bit older than her, but I didn’t think the hill was too bad. It’s only 700 metres up there, and some wonderful places to stop and take photos.  This first pic is from about half way up the hill, taken across the M1 at a couple of the Glasshouse Mountains.

 

Carrying up the hill was very slow, even for someone like me who smiles about it. Despite only 700m from the carpark to the top, it seems to get steeper, especially past the halfway. I sometimes think of someone in Wellington (NZ) who lives in such steep hills!

Up the top at the canopy there were steps to the top. The canopy itself has posters all around it giving history of the different views – a full circle. This picture is almost the same of Glasshouse Mountains that I took halfway down the hill, but you can still see the Bruce Highway going straight through, The third picture looks south, towards Brisbane showing the Bruce Highway traffic.

A young family – mum, dad and small daughter – caught me up at the top just as I was ready to walk down. I thought the wee girl had done so well – until dad told me she was sitting on his shoulders on the way up!

I walked down the hill almost at a very quick pace, feeling very ahead of the new (old) chap who was heading the way up. This, to me, looks so much like the steep motorbike roads I used to get used to. They were very steep!

When I got back to the carpark I saw a car which left – they obviously didn’t like the steepness of the walkway, but I felt pretty good with it – only 700m!

Back into my car, I got back on the Bruce Highway, took the Deception Bay exit off the M1, and before the middle of the day I got home. It almost felt like a wee secret drive, which never took me so long. Perhaps, now, I’m a bit frustrated with these sort of Glasshouse Mountains which are now so very close to me than they ever used to be.  Perhaps I just need to go just a wee bit further…